slam my eyelids hard aginst each other
slo unwilling but I caint control the
weight of homemade eyelashes
sink my fists hard in my jeans aginst my thighs
theyre aware of of their gracelss bulge
but too sweaty and vulnerable to remain exposed for u to reach for
lay my smile in its grave
stif vacuum of meaning
it takes no pleasure to scare u with its grey humanless parlour.
my fears don lie dark behind my eyz
they don shrink under my palms
they don’t tunnel beneath my frown.
But I am terrified of the directions ur eyes shift
And slide away an squint
The bloated an natural paths ur hands,
Unnoticed, wind their pendulum routine
Making patterns Across my pale bones
Your common pretty smile doesn’t falter
Jus like an over edited poem:
Clipd an trimd to offenselessness
I tremble in ur glossy shado
an predict the ways
I cant find a break in . breakthrough.
June 8-02
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